Before you open that door…

antique art closed door

Coming home after work is a danger time for blokes. We’ve had a hard day dealing with stress, conflict and tension. All we want to do is relax. But our home can also be a place of stress, conflict and tension.

Here’s some things to think about and do before you open that door…

As you drive home think about some of the things from the day that stressed you out (or that you’re happy about). It may not be possible to have a plan for them but at least pray briefly about them, asking for God’s help in that situation. Think of this time as mentally closing windows overnight until you open them again in the morning.

When you pull up in the driveway remember some biblical truths about your wife and family.

  • God calls us to love our wives like Christ loved the church (Eph 5:25-28). We have received Christ’s self-sacrificial love and have been blessed with grace, forgiveness and hope. As husbands our role is to let that love flow towards our wives. Home is not primarily a place for us to relax and be served. It’s primarily a place for us to sacrificially love our wives (recall your marriage vows). So our first thoughts need to be, as we walk through that door, “How can I care for my wife? What will she need from me right now? Will I need to listen to her talk about her day, or bath the kids, or feed the cat? How can I encourage her?”


  • God calls us to not provoke our children but instead bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord (Eph 6:1).  God is our heavenly father and has adopted us into his family and now we get the chance to express godly fatherhood to our kids. We don’t get much time with them so we want to use it well. So our thoughts should be, as we walk through that door, “How can I encourage my kids? How can I help them feel loved, safe and cared for? What good attitude can I bring to family Bible time this evening?”

You can see this is a long way from coming home for peace and quiet, some food, a beer or some television. Coming home is not about you! But also, this often won’t be an easy task. There can be stress and conflict at home and we often lack the wisdom and patience to do what is right.

So as you turn off the car engine take a few moments to pray for God’s help and strength to serve and please him at home.

Then leave the car, go up to the door, and walk through.


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